Succumb

Feeling so exhausted is really a failure of the day. I was full of headache last night but I feel well today. Very light even drank. Its the very first time I never had a hang over...with the hard. I just give-in to the emotions that was recently bothering me. The life of a person I used t know, now, I believe is totally gone. I am a loser and I submit myself to that. I never had this freedom of feelings. As if Im over. Im into the shadow of hurt, of tiredness, of shame and of fear. This is not me! I never give-up. I never give a damn care of whatever those people are giving me. The person I am knows when and how to ignore those who are indeed needed to be ignored. Who am I right now?! I don't even know myself. I don't know you, him or they. I don't know this or that. I don't know anything and some would think Im great but Im not! Im with my mask. The happy, the cheerful, the smiley, maybe cool, maybe strong but all of that was not me anymore. I never was, I even forgot how to be that person. I feel down for losing. I should be over it. When will I ever be out of my shell? I should act on my age but Im still in this sticky thing holding me and I cant move out. Just leave me alone and I just wanted to understand that my life is not bound to turn on the life of a person, of a certain emotion and feelings and of the shadow of anything. I have to be out and I have to be a soldier. I have to fight against it and I have to live a new life...with or without you! With or without anything to have!